February 19, 2011

Blogging is a good form to use when you want to vent or make comments about things without hurting people or even if you want to say something good about what is going on in life. Today started out good and then all hell broke loose. You see the house we live in has a basement and at 1st I would not even go down there but I slowly started making progress and going down there. The steps that lead down there are narrow and steep and has no hand rails. The only thing to hold onto is the wall. Well today as i was taken a load of clothes down to the basement I fell hit my back on the hard concrete steps and my head on the wall. And by the way the wall is also concrete. So my head hurts and so does my back. I am also feeling light headed and dizzy. OMG I HURT LIKE I WAS RUN OVER BY A MAC TRUCK. Okay I would be dead in that case but you get the idea right?And my husband is working today, manadory overtime. But when he gets home I am going to go to the ER and make sure I dont have a concusion or anything like that. HELP ME GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday March 30, 2010

With tomorrow being my 40th birthday I am a bit ecited and a bit nervous. I know this means that I am older but I do not feel it. Even though I am over weight I feel I am in good health and tomorrow I have a doctors appointment and I will then find out for sure what kind of health I am in. I do not have much planned tomorrow and I am looking forward to a nice quite day tomorrow. Well this sis all for now.

Wednesday March 24, 2010

Yestersay my son and I reached a new level in our relationship. He and his soon to be wife and her children want to come and see me. They are driving up Thursday to spend the weekend with us. I am trying so hard to change things in my life. I wonder life would be like if everyone could be happy all the time. You see in a week I will be 40 and even though some may look at it as getting old I do not. It is only a number. My age does not bother me, it is the way I look. And even though I am trying to loose the weight I sometimes find myself slurging and eating junk food like I was before weight watchers. I am kinda getting lazy again. What am I doing to myself. Part of me want to loose wieght but the other part is scared to loose it. Can I really do it? Will my life be diffrent? Will I be diffrent? How will my life change once the weight is gone? Mostly what scares me is the attention I will bring to myelf. People who know me and people who don't know me will look at me diffrent. That too scares me. Well maybe I should see a therpist for that. Well I am going to keep my head above water sorta speak and try to stay on the diet.

Saturday March 13, 2010

I am sorry I have not posted in a while. I started a new carrer at the end of Feb and have been busy getting it up off the ground. Today I will be going to weigh in for the 1st time in almost 3 weeks. If it was not the busy schedule it was something else. For about 2 weeks I was fighting a real bad cold or maybe it was the flu. I am not sure which, I just know I was fighting this thing and between the fever and not being able to breath I lost a lot of sleep. Plus Steve has been working so much these past weeks trying to make sure we had moeny for rent and other things too. We kicked out our roommate becuase of the lack of rent she was paying us. Along with other reason which I a just not in the mood to go into. I pray that we won't fall beind in any bills. They riased his child support again and we will be lucky to get $100 each week. They still have not hired him on premenant and I am being to think they are not going to. What is taking them so long. I will post more after I get back from weighing in. Today is going to be a cleaning day since Steve has the weekend off! Okay well I lost a tenth of a pound since I last wieghed in. Well I am retaining water this week plus I have not gotten out to get any excerise! Well Next week will be a diffrent time!

Saturday Feb 20, 2010

OH WOW! I can not believe I have lost a total of 11.2 pounds. How did that happen! I mean I am surprised with myself but at the same time I am so proud of myself! I have been calling people all morning, well not all morning. I did take a nap. I kept seeing those pounds walk away from me in my sleep and I hear GOD tell me how proud He is of me! Now here is one, I called my mom and she said those words I never thought I would hear her say, that she was proud of me. Hear I am almost 40 years old and the 1st time in my life she says she is proud of me. I have done things in my life that makes others proud of me and it takes me loosing weight to make her proud of me! WOW this day has been a day to remember! I have not told Steve yet, but only cause he is working. But I know he will be proud of me. I can not wait to tell him. I love bragging on myself. It may sound a bit coincided but I feel I deserve this. Anyone who has struggle with weight or any kind of problems in their life time and has a milestone as I have deserves to brag! I wish Nathan was talking to me so I could tell him! I know he would be thrilled for me! Anyway I won't talk about him, I can not let myself get down! I hear Satan trying to tell me that I am fat and always will be but I also hear GOD telling me He is proud of me and keep up the good work! I only have 231.4 pounds to go until I am at my goal weight! I am very excited about the weight loss. I think joining weigh watchers was an excellent decision. I have becomemore aware of what and how much I eat! WOW! I still can not believe it! I hope it is not a dream!

Saturday Feb 13, 2010

WOW, I LOST 3.6 LBS! I am so excited about that! I had a great week. Found another cool way to excerise when it is too cold to walk. You see max, my dog, loves to wrestle and I am also in the middle of obedance tranning. I love that dog! Anyway i get abou the same amount of exceise wrestling for 10 min than I would walking for 5! Intersting, right? I bought a yoga mat, well for pilates. I was doing it at one time, but lost track of it! I want to get back into. When i did it before my posutre was better and I felt better! Well I did not have much back problems! Well I got a pilates video and a excerise ball that I bought at a yard sale in the summer time! Okay I am so ready for spring! I am buying a bike, and so is Steve! We will be riding our bikes all over the place, well mostly me! I can not wait til then! Wish I could afford one now! All I can do is look around for one! We will see!

Monday Feb 08, 2010

Well i slept passed brakfast this morning. I am not very hungry today for some reason. I guess a lot of it has to due with the amount of food I ate yesterday. I do feel guilty though, but today I am not eating anything but fruits and veggies. I had a nice salad and a banana and a can of pinapples for lunch! For dinner I will have another salad and another banana. Don't have anymore pinapples so I will probaly have an orange or a grapefruit! Don't think I will have much to drink today, maybe a glass of water here and there! We will see what happens! Valentines Day is only 6 days away! I can't wait to then. I am not sure what he has planned but Steve has already told his boss he can't work that day.....it is on a Sunday anyways!
Well I just had dinner. I wind up eating a lean steak sandwhich on low fat wheat bread. I used 8 points for dinner I think, now I think I am going to have a nice giant fudge bar.....no worries it a weight watchers bar.